


Brothers Forever

by Seascribe



Category: Men's Hockey RPF
Genre: Gen, Magical Realism, Tattoos, brofeels
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-09
Updated: 2018-12-09
Packaged: 2019-09-14 14:56:38
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,213
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16915023
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Seascribe/pseuds/Seascribe
Summary: Jordie's far away, but he's still there, still Jamie's.  For now.





	Brothers Forever

They weren't magical tattoos. It's not like they were against those, like some religious nutjobs were. They both had a couple; a little sigil of protection behind Jamie's left ear that he'd gotten after his first concussion; a charm for--supposedly--virility on Jordie's left hip, done by a friend of a friend in high school. Most of the others were just garden variety pigment and lines. Some of them were special, sure, had meanings and symbolism and shit, and some of them were just flash, born of out of newly full bank accounts and liking the idea of ink.

This one was one of the special ones, carefully planned and identical on both of them. They'd gone to three different artists before they found the one that felt right, who got what they wanted and what it meant to them. It was simple and they took some flak for it, on social media and in the locker room, but who cared, it wasn't for other people. 

**

"Hey," Jordie says when the call from Jim Nill comes. "It's not like I'm dying, buddy. Just playing somewhere else. It'll be fun to try and beat each other, eh?" 

_No,_ Jamie thinks. He says, "We're supposed to play _together_." 

"We had a pretty good run," Jordie says. "And this doesn't change anything that matters. Brothers forever, right?"

Jamie rubs his fingers over the ambigram on his forearm and gives him a wobbly smile. Gotta try, for Jordie. "Yeah. Brothers forever."

At the airport, Jordie gives him a long, tight hug and a noogie. "I'm not gonna go easy on you in March," he teases. "Bring your A game." 

"I'm gonna kick your ass," Jamie retorts. He still feels like somebody is slowly and methodically hollowing out his chest with a dull spoon, but he manages a smile. Can't let Jordie worry about him. 

Jordie ruffles his hair one last time and goes through the security line without looking back. Jamie watches him go and rubs the ambigram and tries not to imagine it fading.

**

Jamie has so many dreams about the ambigram disappearing that he doesn't notice at first. It's still there and Jordie's still there, on the other end of the text messages and skype calls and occasional instagram tags. The details don't matter. Jordie's far away, but he's still there, still Jamie's. For now. 

Jordie meets the team plane at the airport and instead of Jamie going on the bus to the hotel, he goes in Jordie's truck back to his apartment. It's nice enough, not that different than their place in Dallas, except Juice is missing and there's Canadian beer in the fridge again. Jamie tries not to mope too obviously as they get ready for dinner. 

"Hey, did something happen to your arm?" Jordie asks over expensive steak in downtown Montréal. 

Jamie grunts around a mouthful of steak and rolls his shoulder. "Nuh uh?"

"No, not like that, I mean your tattoo. It looks different." 

"It's still there!" Jamie says. That's the most important thing.

Jordie rolls his eyes. "Obviously. Lemme see." He grabs Jamie's arm and stretches it across the table, rubbing a thumb over the ink. "Dude, did you let somebody hex it?"

Jamie shakes his head. "Of course not! Why would I do that!"

"I don't know, maybe it was an accident or something. But it's definitely different, look." Jordie holds his arm out beside Jamie's, comparing the ambigrams in the low restaurant light. Jordie's looks perfect, the same as ever. Jamie's...well, Jamie's looks kind of like if it had been written on a page and had a hand dragged over it, like Jamie's handwriting when he was first learning how, opposite to everybody else. It's halfway down his forearm and creeping around his elbow, up his tricep. 

"It's _fine,_ " Jamie snaps, jerking his arm back. It _has_ to be, because it's apparently how things are and he's just not going to think about it. What else can he do? 

Jordie sighs and shakes his head at him and orders another round of drinks.

**

Jamie doesn't change a strategy that works, so he spends the next three seasons resolutely ignoring the slow creep of his tattoo up his arm, around his shoulder, towards his neck. He plays hockey and misses Jordie and counts down the weeks til summer. Jordie'd tried a couple of times to bring the tattoo up again, get him to go see somebody about it, but Jamie shut it down every time, and eventually Jordie gave up. His tattoo looks pretty much exactly like it did the day they got them.

By spring, the ambigram--harder to read now--is on Jamie's neck. He doesn't like having a neck tattoo, has never wanted one, and thinks maybe he should go see somebody about it. But that would be acknowledging that something is wrong and he's not about to do that. The Stars are fighting to hold onto their playoff spot and he needs to focus. The tattoo creeps on, ignored, towards his ear. 

Jamie wakes up before his alarm on the morning of the last home game of the season and lies there for a few minutes trying to figure out what woke him. 

_you are loved._

He thumbs his phone on and sees a text notification from Jordie. _knock 'em dead tonight. i'll be watching!_

_you are loved._

Jamie shoots back the hockey emoji and the thumbs up emoji and stumbles to the bathroom to pee and wash his face. 

_you are loved._

It echoes through his head through morning skate, as he drifts off for his nap, when he scores in the game. He tries not to think about it. They win the game. Jamie doesn't think about anything but playoffs and what he needs to do to help the team win. 

_you are loved._

On locker room cleanout day, Sarah smiles and tells him there's a surprise for him after media. Jamie's not really feeling surprises, but Sarah's nice, so he smiles at her and says he can't wait. He gets his stuff packed up and answers questions with carefully coached soundbites and then he goes to find Sarah. He hopes whatever she's got planned is quick.

"Hi, Jamie." Sarah's beaming at him, her real smile, not her shiny media smile. "I want to introduce you to a new member of our development team."

"Oh. Okay, sure." Jamie doesn't know what's going on, but he can be polite, to make Sarah happy. 

_you are loved._

She ushers him into one of the offices and says, "Meet our new assistant coordinator for player development."

Jordie stands up and pulls him into a back-slapping hug. "Hey, Chubbs. What do you think?" 

"What about hockey?" It's the only thought he can get to come through clear enough to verbalize. 

"Thought it over and decided I'd rather be home," Jordie says. "Take a look at the rink from the other side of the bench."

"Oh," Jamie says and reaches instinctually to rub at his forearm even though the ambigram hasn't been there for years. He doesn't know what to say and when he looks down to try to collect his thoughts, he sees the familiar black lines under his fingers, where they're supposed to be.


End file.
